Removing divorcing stepparent from custody orders-options other than modification? A few months ago (after a long fight) my ex and I agreed to custody order modifications which included his wife. Now they have initiated divorce proceedings. Is there a non-mod way to have her removed from the orders or does it require that we modify? We agree on this, there are other issues we’d fight over. If we mod, should I wait until the divorce is finalized or is there anything I should start earlier? We’ll have to mod eventually over other changes from this, but I have long had concerns about her and would like it taken care of sooner if possible.
If you and your ex-husband agree on terms of a modification that would remove his current wife from any custody or parent time, I suggest that you both sign an agreement to modify that portion of the custody award now. Marco is right that things may change in their divorce. But if you get an agreement now, you can bind him to remove her. With an agreement, modification of the current parent-time order will be fairly simple since the court will likely grant a stipulated change.
Yes, you need to modify, but do not let that cause you to delay. If there are modifications that you cannot agree to, however, that may be a problem. You should consult an attorney if you have questions about disputed parts of the order.