3 TIPS FOR GETTING THROUGH THE DIVORCE PROCESS

Going through the divorce process can be stressful. There is often uncertainty, unfairness, and uncivility, among other challenges. These challenges can both make your life difficult and interfere with your case. It is worth finding ways to overcome the challenges, even mid-divorce.

The attorneys at Christensen Law are Utah divorce lawyers. They are accustomed to handling divorce, custody, and other family law matters for local and out-of-state clients. Below, Christensen Law provides some tips that may help you. However, keep in mind that all situations are different. For advice tailored to you, you should consult a Utah divorce attorney.

Tip #1: Stay Organized and Keep Up with Things

You need to know what to ask the court to rule on. And, you will need to gather the evidence or testimony to support your arguments. Even if represented by an attorney, you need to coordinate with him or her.  If you want the court to split bank accounts, you need to show account statements. If the other side is harassing you with texts, you need to show the texts. Perhaps you are disputing alimony, and if so you will need to track and document expenses.

Tip #2: Try to Stay Calm During Hearings and Mediation

Feeling strong emotions is to be expected. However, if you lose control at a key moment, there could be long-term consequences. At hearings or trial, your demeanor in the courtroom will have a direct effect on the outcome of the hearing. The judge will note your behavior. Even if he or she does not, negative behavior will distract your attorney. As for mediation, you often will be in an entirely separate room with only your attorney. But, if you are not calm, you may make poor decisions that will have long-term consequences.

Tip #3: Consider Therapy or Counseling

A divorce is a big change and typically comes with an assortment of emotional issues. It may be that therapy or counseling could prove useful. A therapist or counselor can help you overcome the
emotional injury associated with divorce. He or she could help you find constructive ways to address ongoing challenges. And, he or she can help you learn how to develop the skills to deal with an ex-spouse.

Peter Christensen3 TIPS FOR GETTING THROUGH THE DIVORCE PROCESS
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How to Have Your Voice Heard in Your Divorce or Custody Case

In Utah, it is common for those struggling with a divorce case to leave the courtroom feeling that their voice went unheard. Part of this stems from the use of the domestic commissioner system in Utah’s more populous counties. Many family law hearings in Utah occur in front of a domestic commissioner. The commissioner typically holds abbreviated hearings where family law attorneys summarize evidence.

The lawyers at Christensen Law are divorce attorneys in Utah. We assist clients with divorce, custody, and child support cases. Through our experience, we have found a number of ways to help
our client’s voices be heard. Below, we provide some key tips. However, each case has it’s own challenges. For advice specific to your case, feel free to contact us for a free consultation.

Work Closely with Your Attorney to Draft a Written Statement

Domestic commissioner and judges often review written statements submitted prior to the hearing. Sometimes, they are better at reading than listening. Working with your attorney to write out what you want the commissioner or judge to know can help your case. Your voice in the writing will be persuasive. An attorney can help ensure that what you tell the court is relevant and helpful.

Prepare for and Request an Evidentiary Hearing Before the Judge

Sometimes you will not be persuasive in writing. Or, perhaps the other side is able to overstate their case in their writing. If you are unhappy with the commissioner’s recommendation, you may request an evidentiary hearing before the judge. On custody issues and certain others, the judge is obligated to allow an evidentiary hearing. At the hearing, you will at least be able to cross-examine the other side about their statement.

Gather, Summarize, and Present Evidence

Complaining about never getting parent time or being child support goes only so far. If you want to drive the point home, gather evidence. If the evidence is voluminous, prepare a summary. Backing up your claims will help them carry more weight.

Peter ChristensenHow to Have Your Voice Heard in Your Divorce or Custody Case
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Supervised Visitation

The State of Utah recognizes a parent’s fundamental liberty interest in raising his or her children. They will ordinarily allow divorced or separated parents to have unrestricted and unsupervised access to their children. However, a court can order supervised visitation if they find the child subject to harm if left unsupervised with the parent.  They will also order supervised visitation if no less restrictive means are available to protect the child. Supervised parent-time is as it sounds. A parent may receive permission to have parent-time with the child. However, the parent cannot exercise that time alone with the child. They must have a supervisor present to oversee the parent-time.

How to Get Supervision for the Other Parent’s Visitation Time

The parent requesting supervised parent time has a great deal to do if they want the other parent’s time supervised.

First, they must prove the child could be harmed if the other parent’s time with the children was unsupervised.  Courts typically find such when the child has been subject to physical or sexual abuse. They also find this when the parent has drug addiction and has used in the presence of the children.  It can also happen if the parent has put the children in physical danger. Minor criminal charges, DUIs, disagreements between the parents are usually not enough to justify supervised parent-time. The moving party must also show that there are no less restrictive means available to protect the children. This means that the party must show the court that there is nothing else the court can do to protect the children except order the supervised parent-time.

Supervised parent-time is not something that a court typically orders absent extreme circumstances. The court sees supervised parent time as an extreme remedy and will only order it if no better option exists. If you are considering asking a court to order supervised parent-time for the other parent, please consult with the Utah custody lawyers at Christensen Law to make sure that your situation justifies such an extreme remedy.

What to Expect from the Court

If the court orders supervised parent-time, the court will give preference to a supervisor suggested and agreed to by the parties, including any relatives. Then, if the suggested person is willing to supervise, and the court finds them capable, they will authorize the person to supervise the parent-time. If the parties cannot authorize anyone, the court can require professional services to supervise the parent’s parent-time.

Every time the court orders supervised parent time, the court must provide specific goals and expectations for the parent to accomplish before unsupervised they get parent-time. The court will hold follow-up hearings to review the parent’s progress with the specific goals and expectations. The parent with supervised parent time may file a petition to modify the order at any time. They just need to show they’ve accomplished the goals and expectations set by the court. If you have supervised visitation with your children and want to get the supervision removed, please consult with the Utah custody lawyers at Christensen Law to see if you have a case to have the supervised visitation removed.

Peter ChristensenSupervised Visitation
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Objecting to a Commissioner’s Recommendation

Court commissioners have limited judicial authority compared with a court judge. A court commissioner initially hears the majority of family law matters. At the conclusion of a hearing, the court commissioner will make a recommendation on orders regarding the relief requested. However, if an individual is unsatisfied with the commissioner’s recommendation,
Utah law provides a method to object to the commissioner’s recommendation. The District Court Judge then considers the matter.

Under Utah Rules of Civil Procedure Rule 108, a party may file a written objection to the recommendation. It must be filed within fourteen (14) days after the recommendation is:

  • made in open court, OR
  • when the minute entry in the recommendation is served.

The objection consists of a written pleading filed with  the court. The Utah Rules of Civil Procedure Rule 7 governs the length and content of the pleading.

The objecting party must identify:

  • the particular findings of fact
  • conclusions of law
  • order, OR
  • part of the recommendation to which the objection refers and state the relief sought.

Presenting Evidence to a Judge

Ordinarily, only evidence presented to the commissioner will have presented to the judge. However, the judge may consider new evidence if there has been a substantial change of circumstances since the commissioner made his or her recommendation. The non-objecting party has a chance to respond to the objection as provided under Utah Rules of Civil Procedure Rule 7. It is possible that both parties can object to the commissioner’s recommendation since the commissioner can make several decisions or recommendations.

The same findings of fact or conclusions of law made by the commissioner do not bind the judge. The judge will make independent findings of fact and conclusions of law based on the evidence, whether by

  • proffer
  • testimony, OR
  • exhibit

This is different than appealing a case or decision to the Utah Court of Appeals or the Utah Supreme Court. The district court judge is not required to give deference to the commissioner’s findings like the Court of Appeals or Supreme Court must do at times. Either party may request a hearing before the judge; however a judge does not necessarily have to agree to have a hearing and can decide the matter based on the motions and evidence presented. If neither party requests a hearing, then the judge can either make a decision based on the record or decide to hold a hearing on its own.

Things to be Aware of Concerning Filing an Objection

An objection is an important tool an individual can use to get a fair and equitable result. If an individual believes the recommendation made by the commissioner to be unfair or inequitable, that individual has the right to object to the recommendation and have the matter heard again before the judge. However, an individual should not approach the initial hearing with the commissioner with minimal effort.

The judge usually only considers evidence presented to the commissioner. Evidence not presented to the commissioner will not be presented to the judge. An objection can also be a costly procedure. While an individual may prevail in their objection, they will incur extra legal fees. In the alternative, an individual can lose his or her objection and still end up with the extra legal fees. If you are considering objecting to a commissioner’s recommendation, please consult with your Salt Lake City family lawyers to discuss the pros and cons of doing so.

Heidi RogersObjecting to a Commissioner’s Recommendation
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The Impact of an Affair on Your Divorce Case

Many people consider divorce after discovering a partner’s affair. As a salt lake city divorce lawyer, the Christensen Law Firm and I have represented numerous clients whose marriages ended due to infidelity. This includes representing clients on both sides of the equation. Often, clients want to know whether cheating impacts issues like alimony, custody, and child support.

In Utah, adultery initiates divorce as a considered fault ground. Utah is a “no fault” divorce state. This means neither party needs to prove fault in order for a divorce to be granted. However, a party can allege fault, such as adultery, as grounds for divorce. The benefit of alleging adultery as grounds for the divorce is a question which requires careful consideration. Accordingly, consult an attorney regarding the specific facts of each case.

Building a Divorce Case Around Evidence of an Affair

Although an affair used as grounds for a fault-based divorce in Utah, cheating can have little effect on a case if the fact of cheating has not directly impacted the parties’ children or the couple’s finances. However, if the cheating party squandered marital assets while pursuing an affair or if the children were directly impacted by the affair through exposure to one parent’s sexual exploits, these facts can have an impact on custody and support.

Finally, whatever side of the infidelity you find yourself on, it is helpful to discuss your options with an attorney. We can help you

  • understand the law
  • get a sense of what kind of support you can receive
  • and custody entitled to you in the divorce.
Heidi RogersThe Impact of an Affair on Your Divorce Case
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Qualified Domestic Relations Order (QDRO)

Retirement accounts, including but not limited to

  • 401ks
  • IRAs
  • pension plans

These are usually some of the most important assets to divide between divorcing spouses. Parties typically agree on how this account divides between them. However, the parties and their attorneys need to be more specific. They need to do more than designate the divorce decree or settlement agreement to divide the accounts. The retirement plan can be subject to the Employee Retirement Security Act (ERISA). If this is the case, the parties will need to draft a Qualified Domestic Relations Order (QDRO). The Court and the retirement plan’s administrator both then accept or reject the QDRO. A party who does not draft a proper QDRO can find themselves forfeiting a portion, or the entire amount, of the retirement account, that the party received in the divorce decree.

What is a QDRO?

A retirement account subject to ERISA requires a special order to divide the retirement account to award a portion of the account to an individual other than the plan participant. The alternate payee refers to the individual receiving a portion of their spouse’s account. A proper QDRO consists of an order approved by the Court and the plan administrator. They certify that the division of the retirement account complies with both federal law and the plan administrator’s specific requirements. Once approved, the plan administrator can divide the retirement account. They then award a portion of the account to the alternate payee.

Do I need a QDRO?

Only retirement accounts subject to ERISA require a QDRO. An IRA usually does not require a QDRO. This is because the account owner is the person in control of the account and considered the plan administrator (I.R.C. § 408). However, each retirement plan is different. It is best to check with the plan administrator to see what documents they require to divide the account.

Important QDRO Considerations

It is important that you consult with your Salt Lake City divorce lawyer when contemplating the division of any retirement account. Usually, the attorney for the alternate payee is the party responsible for drafting the QDRO. There are, however, many attorneys who do not draft QDROs. It is important that you talk with your attorney to know if they plan on drafting the QDRO or if you will need separate counsel.

Many retirement account plan administrators have sample QDRO forms that an attorney or party can fill out. However, it is important to remember that the plan administrator designed these forms for their ease. They are not designed necessarily for the benefit of the alternate payee. It is important that the alternate payee’s attorney carefully drafts a QDRO that is in the best interests of his or her client and not for the ease of the plan administrator.

It is vital that a party drafts a QDRO immediately. A person who unnecessarily delays drafting and finalizing the QDRO may inadvertently waive their interest in the retirement plan. If you were awarded a portion of a retirement account in a divorce and do not know if the account was properly divided by a QDRO, please consult with us immediately to see what options are available.

Heidi RogersQualified Domestic Relations Order (QDRO)
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What to Expect at Mediation

Utah courts often require you to mediate if you are party to a divorce or custody case. Sometimes this happens earlier in the case if it seems like a settlement is likely. Other times, the mediation comes later. A successful mediation can end the case and save you money.

Christensen Law is a Salt Lake City law firm, and its attorneys can help you in court and at mediation. Obviously, our advice is tailored to specific individuals, situations, and cases. However, we provide below some general tips to keep in mind.

Be Prepared

At mediation, you will be negotiating and possibly agreeing to a long-term arrangement. You must know what you need and what you want. Some of your needs and wants are obvious to you. Others are not so obvious. An attorney can help you avoid pitfalls and traps from a sloppy settlement.

Don’t Worry About Being Too Prepared

There is no script that you must follow. You will find that the mediator will effectively push the discussion along.

Keep Long-Term Consequences in Mind

We have two specific warnings for long-term consequences.

  1. We understand that you want the case to be over as soon as possible. Wanting to end the case quickly can lead you to accepting a bad settlement. However, if you cannot live with the result, you will be in court again.
  2. We understand that there are issues or items important to you. We also understand that things are sometimes unfair. Sometimes fighting only makes it worse. There are times when you will need to cut your losses.

Patience

Be prepared to be patient. Mediation sessions often last several hours. Often there is not much progress in the first couple of hours. Sometimes there is an agreement, but it takes a long time to fine tune the details.

Ensure the Settlement Is Written and Signed

The other party may get buyer’s remorse. Unfortunately, your settlement is worth very little if it is not in writing.

Heidi RogersWhat to Expect at Mediation
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How to Declare Paternity For Unmarried Partners

When a husband and wife have a baby, the law recognizes them as the parents of the child. Both parents enjoy certain legal rights and responsibilities. When an unmarried mother gives birth, the father doesn’t automatically have any of the legal rights or duties that go along with fatherhood. Establishing paternity (fatherhood) gives unmarried fathers all the same rights and duties that married parents have when a child is born.

Paternity is established in three possible ways to unmarried parents.

 

1. Declaration of Paternity

First, both parents may sign and file a voluntary Declaration of Paternity. The Declaration of Paternity must be:

  • In a record prescribed by the Office of Vital Records;
  • Signed under penalty of perjury by the mother and father;
  • Signed in the presence of two witnesses who are not related by blood or marriage; and
  • State that the child whose paternity is being declared has a presumed father whose full name is stated and does not have any other declared or court-determined father;
  • State whether there has been genetic testing and, if so, that the father’s claim of paternity is consistent with the results of the genetic testing; and
  • State that the mother and father understand that the declaration equals a legal finding of paternity for the child. Very limited circumstances permit a challenge to the declared fatherhood.

A Declaration of Paternity may be completed and signed any time after the birth of the child. Once completed and signed, filing the Declaration puts it into effect. The Office of Vital Records then enters it into their database to establish and maintain it.

The Declaration of Paternity is the fastest, easiest and least expensive way to establish paternity in Utah.

2. Administrative Paternity Order

One parent may apply for child support services and obtain an Administrative Paternity Order. The Office of Recovery Services provides this service once paternity is verified.

3. Petition Requesting Judgment of Paternity

Finally, one or both parents, the child, or the state of Utah may file a petition in court requesting a judgment of paternity. If the court contests the petition, then they may order a blood or genetic marker test to determine paternity.

Establishing paternity provides many benefits to families, including:

  • Financial support from both parents
  • Includes the child on either parent’s health insurance plan
  • May help doctors to obtain the child’s family health history through research
  • Permits a father to pursue the rights that go along with fatherhood including decision-making and parent-time
  • Gives the child claim to benefits from the father such as inheritance, social security, and veteran’s benefits.

If you are trying to establish your rights as a father, give Christensen Law a call. We can help you work through the legal process necessary to protect your rights.

Heidi RogersHow to Declare Paternity For Unmarried Partners
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When Should I File a Petition to Modify?

Parents often ask a Salt Lake City family lawyer what needs to happen in order to modify their existing custody arrangement. Unfortunately, the answer is always “It depends.”

Utah law allows one or both parents of a child to petition a court to modify. They can modify an order that establishes joint legal or physical custody. A parent would have to show enough evidence that shows the circumstances of the child or parents have changed significantly. This is relevant if the changes have been made since the entry of the order that is being modified. They also have to show that the change of the previous order would be in the best interest of the child. A court will almost always require the disputing parents to mediate the dispute before the court decides the matter.

There Needs to be Substantial Change

In order to modify the existing custody arrangement, the moving party must demonstrate a material and substantial change since the entry of the previous order. Even if the proposed new arrangement would be more beneficial to the child, a court cannot consider the new arrangement without first finding a substantial and material change has occurred. In determining a possible modification, the court will consider a variety of factors.

These include (but are not limited to):

  • the past conduct and moral standards of each of the parties
  • the desires of the parties
  • the ability of a parent to have frequent and continuing contact with the other parent
  • the proximity of the homes of the parents
  • the ability of the parents to cooperate
  • any other factors the court finds relevant.

The court will give substantial weight to the existing order if the child is thriving, happy, and well-adjusted.

 

Whether or not a material and substantial changes have occurred is a factual determination. This varies from situation to situation and court to court. Courts have found that a parent’s relocation, a child starting school, and one parent continually preventing the other parent from exercising his or her parenting time is enough to justify a modification. However, a court will not automatically find those specific situations enough to justify a modification. It is important to consult with a Salt Lake City family law attorney before a parent files a petition to modify. This ensures the parent has a valid basis to modify. It is important to not file a petition to modify or answer frivolously. The court has the ability to assess the other parent’s attorney fees as a cost toward the offending parent.

Heidi RogersWhen Should I File a Petition to Modify?
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Initial Disclosures in Utah Divorce and Child Custody Cases

Utah courts require the parties in divorce and child custody cases to make initial disclosures to each other. The deadlines are automatically triggered when the respondent files his or her answer to the divorce or custody petition. Each party needs to meet the requirements to avoid flak from the other party and the court. But, doing initial disclosures right can also ensure that the case goes well. Good initial disclosures can make a positive difference at hearings, mediation, and trial.

As part of your divorce or custody case, Christensen Law’s attorneys assist with initial disclosures. Our assistance includes both preparing your disclosures and reviewing the other spouse or parent’s disclosures. Each case is unique, but below, we provide some generalities for reference purposes only.

What is involved with initial disclosures?

Typically, in family law cases, initial disclosures include financial declarations, witness names, and documents. In domestic cases, such as custody, divorce, parentage, annulment, etc., the parties must provide financial declarations. A financial declaration involves you sharing information about your income, assets, debts, and expenses. Both sides must provide a financial declaration and the documents to back it up. Such supporting documents include bank statements, tax returns, pay stubs, etc. Additionally, the parties should disclose any other documents or witnesses that they might use at

Additionally, the parties should disclose any other documents or witnesses that they might use at trial. The documents can relate to a number of things. When custody is at issue, you will want to gather documents showing your involvement in the lives of your children. For child support, you will want to gather documents showing that the other parent can make money. For debts and assets, you will want anything that supports your preference for how to divide everything. If any witnesses can back up the information, it helps to list them.

Why should you do a good job with initial disclosures?

There are a number of reasons why you should invest time into doing initial disclosures. We offer a number of reasons below:

  • It will help you organize and prepare your own case.
  • Obeying the rules requiring disclosure will keep you in the court’s good graces.
  • Having disclosures available will make it easier to mediate or prepare for mediation.
  • Your preparation and materials can be a reality check for an unreasonable opposing party.
Peter ChristensenInitial Disclosures in Utah Divorce and Child Custody Cases
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